Conflicting Feelings Triptych
I deeply admire my parents overcoming so many financial, cultural, and social barriers to start a new and stable life for my family. However, their traditional beliefs about education has made it difficult to appreciate any other majors besides STEM. Although I’ve been passionate about art since I was little, it was hard for them to accept this as a potential career. Throughout high school they tried to discourage me by belittling my work, questioning what realistic jobs I could get, and how much money I could actually make. Although this upset me and has caused some resentment towards them, I realize that if they haven’t immigrated to America, I probably wouldn’t be able to pursue a future in art at all. I wouldn’t have been able to take art courses outside of school, done art internships, or make it my major.
My Chinese zodiac sign is the rabbit, so I wanted to incorporate all three of our zodiac animals to represent all parts of our relationship, both good and bad. The middle print was definitely a homage to my parents, but I wanted the two prints on the sides to be more about how their background affected me and my passion for art. I used the zodiac symbols of the dog and rat again, but I gave them sharp teeth and claws to emphasize their painful judgement. The bubble cloud text is also in the typical style of other Chinese art and the text inside are actual things they have said to me in the past. The rabbit looks stoic and still in the middle because I felt like I couldn’t move forward with my passion. The Chinese character in the middle of the body, 痛, means pain.
My parents immigrated to America with little to no money, friends or family, and barely knew any English. They came from poor, rural villages in China and both worked and studied hard to escape that life. They both became extremely successful and established a stable life for my family and their relatives back in China. Even though I’ve known this since I was little, I’m still amazed by their courage. I can’t imagine what it was like to leave everything you know to pursue the faint hope of the American Dream.
I wanted to showcase their courageous immigration in a traditional Chinese paper cut art style. I was inspired by my last visit to China during the new year. As my mom and I were walking around her small hometown, we saw and bought back hundreds of these beautiful and intricate paper cut wall décor. I wanted to mimic that graphic style while incorporating personal symbols that represent my parents’ journey.
Chinese zodiac symbols are really important in our culture. My dad and mom are born in the year of the dog and rat respectively, so I chose those two animals to symbolize my parents. I also included the cities and provinces that they’re from in the design of the animal. The top countryside landscape represents their humble beginnings from small villages, and the bottom cityscape represents the more urban landscape of Pittsburgh, where they went to graduate school. The other imagery throughout this print are very typical of New Year paper cut art. The middle character 福, fu, means fortune and blessing. The fish isn’t a zodiac animal, however when the Chinese word is pronounced differently, it means money. Flowers are also common in Chinese paper cut art because it symbolizes nature and beauty.
Despite all of their harmful words, they financially support me to explore and create art. They have sent me to art classes outside of school to learn since I was 12, they let me major in studio art, supported me through nonpaid art internships, and encouraged me to take a variety of art classes at college. This print expresses my gratefulness for allowing me to pursue all of these opportunities.
The rabbit in this piece instead is active, in mid motion leaping in the air. The Chinese character at the center of the body 机会means opportunity. I recognize how if they haven’t immigrated here, I wouldn’t have access to the same programs and experiences. The money bag in the middle has the 福 character which represents how they sponsored me through different art opportunities. The features of the dog and rat are also different from A Deeper Understanding, their faces are formed into a general smile. The three shapes towards the side are traditional Chinese money and the three phrases mean classes, internships, and career.